Sherry asked me to write an article for our church newsletter. Whoa! I haven’t officially written a “paper” since college! Here it is in case you’re interested. Thanks for asking, Sherry! And thanks to you Kathy for the springboard! Your honest question got me thinking at the exact time I was looking for a topic! Here it is:
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I read the following question in a friend’s blog recently. It had to do with sharing in a small group, being open with others and how uncomfortable that can be. I completely understand the feelings behind this:
“I want to know why God is so set against people being in their comfort zone. I mean, really. What is so bad about being able to relax and skate through life sometimes?”
What is a “comfort zone” anyway? My own definition says it is a place inside of us where we feel the least amount of mental or emotional stress or risk. I suspect everyone’s individual comfort zone looks a bit different, depending on what their own strengths and weaknesses are, but each one of us knows exactly where the boundaries of our own comfort zones are.
A person’s comfort zone wields a lot of power and can determine lots of things—big things and little things. It influences where you will live, where you will travel, who you will talk to or associate with, how generous you will be, and many other things. Most importantly, it determines how much you will grow.
Now I am going to step outside of my comfort zone…and tell you about mine! I know it very well. The boundaries of my zone are defined by fear—sometimes the fear of failure, but mostly the fear of what people will think. I am not afraid of a lot of things (heights, enclosed spaces, spiders, etc.), but this fear is real for me. It has some to do with my personality, but mostly it has to do with where I have settled over time. I spend most of my time inside my comfort zone, and usually it is because I am afraid of venturing out of it.
This brings me to the thought in the blog quoted at the beginning. Is God against a person being in their comfort zone? I suppose it depends on why they are there. If the person stays there because of fear, then yes, I think God is against that. Not everything about a comfort zone is bad, though. When God made humans, he knew we would need to be able to relax and feel safe. And I am sure He uses us right where we are, no matter what, but the edges of our comfort zones are where we grow, so we have to step out of there from time to time!
I believe that if we try to follow Christ, and seek to do what is pleasing to him, our comfort zones will naturally grow to include more things that are not there now—more things that honor and please Him! That is part of the transforming power of God. He wants to make us more like Himself. Like Christ! God’s love, joy, and peace flowing through us will make us more accepting, more giving, more open, and yes, less fearful.
Because of how we were made, it may always be difficult to step out of certain parts of our comfort zones. As for me, I may never feel comfortable speaking in front of large groups of people, but who knows what God has in mind, His power is so great. As I have been opening up with individual friends, and sharing my thoughts in smaller groups, it has been getting easier. Just like in the physical world, doing difficult things—even in small steps—makes us stronger, gives us more confidence, and may even be a real help to those we interact with!
Here are some other things I’ve decided to work on…to push out the walls of my zone. (Remember—yours may look different!)
- Don’t wait…be the first to greet someone (this is an easy one)
- Say “hi” to people I don’t know very well (a little harder, but OK)
- Smile at strangers (This is more risky! I tried this at Lowe’s last week. It was fun to see other people smile back or nod, or look away)
- Make a fool of myself (What?! Did I write that?)
- Admit I was wrong (really hard to do, but the results are good!)
- Ask for help from other people and from God. (Do I really think I can make it through life on my own intelligence and strength?)
- Give more (time, money, advice, whatever anyone asks—just be generous)
As I have thought about this theme, it occurred to me that these things not only apply to us as individuals, but as a body of believers here at NFC. Our corporate comfort zone needs to keep expanding, and adapting to include more things that please God too!
My prayer:
“Jesus, my own comfort has become too important, and determines too many things! I want to be in a place where I am more ready to respond to your promptings, but I often feel confined by the walls I’ve built around myself. I am afraid of what might happen, and what people will think. Please replace that fear with your strength. Thank you that you have helped me to ignore my comfort zone at times—to get out of the way, and let you live through me!”
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